A Peaceful Surrender

January, the month of new beginnings. When new calendar is hung, this month, it stares back in all its pristine glory, untarnished with those penned reminders of busy life. A promise of renewal, freshness to savor and linger with, much like holding a newborn, diminutive head cradled in nook of the arm, guileless and pure. As I mark engagements on the virgin calendar, holding the pen between my fingers, I hear the nightly newscast in the other room, and the messiness enfolds my spirit. Peace. Remember Peace. No resolutions, just Peace.

At the gym I talk with a friend, we perch on stationary bicycles, I turn toward her and say, "It feels like we often get the same life lessons to learn over and over again." I slow. I think of my life journal of re-runs, of repeated pleas, of disciplines not yet mastered. Of broken promises to myself. I swallow Grace and pedal. She gives me an emphatic nod, "'I know, I know exactly you mean!" I think of January, all the moments, blessings and miracles I've yet to behold, to scratch down in ink. Maybe re-runs are OK and crowded journals are unspoken truth. A soothing hymn for the dispirited soul.

 Later, I stop to read another story about loss and survival, quenched hope and beautiful redemption. The downcast granted another chance, a blessing, divine rescue. After reading the story I knew just what January needed. The answer to the elusive question of do-overs. Like a life preserver thrown in deep frigid sea, I reach out with unclenched fist, grab hold of the pen once again, the one discipline that trumps all negativity and fear. I count. Again. Frolicking in the re-runs, writing my thanks to the author of it all, peacefully, joyfully, surrendering to Grace.

# rain pelting windows. #picture on cell of baby boy's face, smeared with carrots. #lavender, just because.#Chevy Chase is funny

"The reward of choosing joy, is joy itself."

~Henri Nouwen~



How To Reign In The New Year

Take with you words, strong words of courage: words that have wings!...Tall words, words that reach up, and growing words, with deep life within them

~Jo Petty~

Each year, after decorations are tucked inside plastic storage bins, stray pine needles swept up, and energy restored with refreshing naps, lists are composed. New Year Resolutions. Weight loss, gym membership, save more money, read the Bible, read anything, make peace with the neighbor. Stop watching the Kardashians on whatever show they must have on television. Making a list is hard work, keeping the bargain made with yourself even harder. I know. I've tried and failed. Each new year. And when I came upon a guest on the Today Show, this man, he talked about his book, about one word, about success and then he spoke two words that tingled my spine, lent me courage to try.

 The author, Jon Gordon, he said to choose one word for the new year, one word to focus on, a word that is for you alone. How can that be? Is it truly possible? Seems way too easy. "Look in, look up, and look out," he told television show co-host. That is how to discover your own one word.

Simplify. Reduce. Disentangle. The idea, an alluring concept, less is always more, and trying on new vanquishes all those what-if's.

Not a manifesto, but a singular thought pinging all year, this hope of moving forward, stepping softly into more of your real beautiful self.

A word will come if summoned, it's been there all along, in the hazy background of chances, lost dreams and dashed hope. Believe in the beautiful, in the power of deep within, and of soaring high above the past, always resting in Truth.

My one word, it came as a surprise. A long anticipated guest you've been waiting eons to meet. I thought I had it narrowed down to two, tried them out a few times, speaking them aloud, into a quiet room. Not certain which to pick, bouncing them back and forth like a Ping-Pong ball, I finally... let go.
And then the word found me.

Peace
2015