Thoughts On Trust

In whom do you put your trust? Your best friend who gossiped behind your back, to your boss? A classmate who cheated on an exam, while peering over at your own paper? A child weighted down by the chains of drug addiction, who hangs around with shady friends? Or perhaps the politician you voted for is corrupt. Victims of abuse often take a life time to conquer the need to control, to protect themselves, to trust love. I've been thinking about trust lately. Oswald Chambers says in My Utmost for His Highest, "Never trust anything in yourself or in anyone else, except the grace of God." If that is true, then by forgiving the accuser, the abuser, the cheater, and even myself, does a channel open for grace, thus eclipsing the pain? I am thinking by keeping my eyes pinned to grace, I might have a better chance at walking in light rather than the darkness of mistrust. It's very difficult to trust someone who has kicked our ego, stolen our property or told lies about us. My natural instinct is to withdraw and withhold, until my vision is clouded by the memory of the pain inflicted, craftily disguised in untamed emotions. But every time I witness a spectacular sunset painted on the horizon, a hazy moon silhouetted  in the sky, another well dug in Africa, or hear the still quiet voice, God's grace blankets my soul. Every time I ignore the voice of fear, the demanding spirit, and cling to grace, my spirit calms and my limbs loosen a bit, reminding me all is well. I believe there is an awesome God observing, applauding, high-fiving, every time we leap over our fears and trust in the magnificent gift of his grace. When I believe my wayward emotions or the suffering inflicted more than the will of God, grace takes a backseat, unnoticed, unappreciated. Each time I trust grace, in goodness, I reach a little bit higher and take a few steps further into love. It's not easy and often seemingly impossible, this trusting thing. I don't have it mastered yet, but I am beginning to see the wisdom in Oswald Chamber's words, that good has already won.